IMY

Fate fell short this time, your smile fades in the summer...

Endless Summer Music

"It feels good to be the one that you want...

when all I want is you...."
                                       -- Never Fade

I'm a sucker for really good lyrics. Jack Johnson's new album is pretty amazing. Good ol' Jack is back. I wasn't a big fan of the last 2 albums, so I was a little hesitant about this one. The sound is so simple and the music is so relaxing. The album makes you feel like you're sitting with him on the beach around a fire. If you liked In Between Dreams, you'll definitely love this one! Listening to this brings me back to the summer when we would spend hours at the beach and then drive home listening  to Jack after an epic surf session. Miss those endless summer days. 

Vanities

Vanity of vanities, says Quohelth,
vanities of Vanaties! All things are vanity!
Here is one who has labored with wisdom and knowledge and skill, and yet to another who has not labored over it, he must leave property. This also is vanity and a great misfortune. For what profit comes to man from all the toil and anxiety of heart with which he has labored under the sun? All his days sorry and grief are his occupation; even at night his mind is not at rest. This is also vanity.

-- Ecclesiastes 1:2; 2:21-23

I went to Sunday Mass in Dickinson on Saturday. That was my first time at this church and apparently it's also a shrine. It's a small humble church with the interior that looked like it was built in the '70s. The church wasn't filled, but there was enough people that my brother and I had to look for open seating that was easily accessible (we were a few minutes late).

The priest had a beautiful Homily that truly hit the spot. He reminded us of the "vanities" in our lives that hold us back. He wasn't talking about materialistic items that we can touch and feel, but the vanities in our hearts and minds that keep us from God. He asked us to write down the things running through our minds that we need to "let go" of. It was a perfect mass, almost felt like God wanted me to be there to listen to the Priest. He couldn't have said it best.

I was reminded that all the current worry in my heart is needless and will just consume my entire being if I continue to hold on to it. All this mental burden is like the rope that ties down the hot air balloon to the ground. If you never let go of the rope, you will never be able to drift into space to see the beauty of the world from the sky. Don't hold pain, worry and stress in your life.... or you'll never be able to enjoy it.

Thank you God for reminding me once again to put my trust in you. I trust that you will take care of me in the next few months and all my prayers will be answered.

Music, The Universal Language

Have you ever listened to a song, and at the end of if you felt some type of emotion? Songs are very powerful ways of expressing how you feel. I've said it before, it's a damn good song if it reminds you of a horrible incident, yet you can still listen to it.

Sometimes when I feel a certain way, my music will reflect it. My running is a perfect example. If I feel relaxed and plan on running for miles on end, I can only listen to acoustics, easy melodies, and calm voices to get me in my zone. In retrospect, when I'm getting ready for a big night I can't help but listen to upbeat tempos that get me moving and excited for the evening.

I love songs with beautiful lyrics. A lot of the old songs have simple sounds, yet their words are amazing.

John Lennon's "Imagine" always makes me feel inspired.

What song inspires you?

January

With Papa's death anniversary coming up & Vinh's right around the corner, and despite the fact that my birthday is this month, I can't help but feel sadness at this time every year. Two great people were taken from this world almost exactly a year apart. Papa lived his life to the fullest, yet suffered the last 5 years of his life; while Vinh at such a young age was drastically taken from us without any warning. I've said it before, and I'll say it again, one can never prepare and be ready for the true heartbreak reality of death until it happens to someone close to you.

For the past 7 months, I have learned the ins and outs of staffing in healthcare. It's brutal and cutthroat. We work with a lot of hospice companies around town and every time we are given a case, my thoughts are always for the family that is going through such a trying time. Death is a part of life, and learning how to cope with it is the challenge to overcome. It breaks my heart when dealing with some of these hospice companies who are not so compassionate with the patients and their families. I just finished begging and pleading one of my nurses to pick up a case that is over an hour drive from her because the company failed to do their part in communicating to us about having enough coverage for the case. If it wasn't my persistence and a little prayer, the dying patient and her family would have been left with an overwhelming situation that they are not prepared to deal with on their own.

I did the best I could trying to cover the case as far as I can, but I can't say the same for the hospice company. It felt almost as if they did not care, it didn't even feel like they even tried. The on call nurse even told me that if we can't find anyone, the case "will just have to end at 8a." WHAT?! I hate being on call too, but I keep trying and trying until there is truly nothing left. Eventually, the psycho calling pays off. Don't get me wrong, not all companies are like this one. In fact, my favorite one would NEVER miss coverage for any case. It just sucks having to deal with these situations.